Quotes and Sayings

All quotes that are retorts Rss-h1

Quote-of-the-day Get the Quote of the Day for Retort

I think you have me confused with someone who's far less awesome.

Michael Weatherly ...

It's right at the top of my To Don't List.

Quotes by James Roday James Roday ...

I teabagged your drum set!

Quotes by Will Ferrell Will Ferrell ...

Delta squad is in your house, %!&&#! You hear that $#!&? You grubby-ass %!&&#@$ are goin' down! Like way down. Dead down, so down you ain't even gonna know which way is up! Your asses are gonna be cryin' to your skank-ass queen, "Oh, mommy, don't let the bad man hurt us!" F#&% you! We're gonna whoop your mamma's ass. Whoo!

Mighty Rasta ...

No, venti is twenty. Large is large. In fact, tall is large and grande is Spanish for large. Venti is the only one that doesn't mean large. It's also the only one that's Italian. Congratulations, you're stupid in three languages.

Paul Rudd ...

Nothing shuts my pie hole but pie.

Corbin Bernsen ...

Watch it, ass blood.

Steve Little ...

Ridicule has historically proven itself a rickety fence for great ideas.

Quotes by Vanna Bonta Vanna Bonta ...

You wanna fight? Why don't you stick your head up my butt and fight for air.

Quotes by David Spade David Spade ...

You just pushed my competitive button, and now it's on.

Quotes by James Roday James Roday ...

A bully's intent to harm behind hate-speak vetoes its credibility.

Quotes by Vanna Bonta Vanna Bonta ...

Noted, and ignored.

Quotes by James Roday James Roday ...

Hey! You're talkin to my guy all wrong. It's the wrong tone. You do it again, I'll stab you in the face with a soldering iron.

Christopher Walken ...

You know what, Dee? I don't want to hear about your dreams, ok. I hate listening to people's dreams. It's like flipping through a stack of photographs. If I'm not in any of them and no one's having $@$, then I don't care.

Glenn Howerton ...

How exactly is a rainbow made? How exactly does the sun set? How exactly does a positrack rear end on a Plymouth work? It just does.

Fred Ward ...

Do not stare at me with those dead eyes, you church %!&&#!

Quotes by Danny McBride Danny McBride ...

Nature abhors a vacuum but why do most people hasten to fill in the blanks with garbage?

Quotes by Vanna Bonta Vanna Bonta ...

I'm Hub McCann. I've fought in two World Wars and countless smaller ones on three continents. I led thousands of men into battle with everything from horses and swords to artillery and tanks. I've seen the headwaters of the Nile, and tribes of natives no white man had ever seen before. I've won or lost a dozen fortunes, killed many men, and loved only one woman, with a passion a flea like you could never begin to understand. That's who I am.

Robert Duvall ...

Oh what do I know? I know that one of us has had their own personal stylist, and one of us shoplifts their $#!& from Fashion Bug. That's what I know.

Quotes by Danny McBride Danny McBride ...

When accused of being an unrealistic optimist, say the sun never stops shining.

Quotes by Vanna Bonta Vanna Bonta ...