Get the Quote of the Day from Jim Carrey
Oh... that! I wasn't gonna just... ram it home, you know. I was gonna... lube it up and ease it in there, inch by inch, like a gentleman
Price check on Vagiclean, aisle five. I repeat: price check on Vagiclean, aisle five. That's Vagiclean. We've got a customer down here with a full-on fallopian fungus. She's baking a loaf of bread and I think it's sourdough.
Yes, behind every good man is a woman rolling her eyes, folks.
Just because I rock doesn't mean I'm made of stone.
Listen, Pocahontas, unless you put your ear to the ground, you'll never hear the buffalo comin'!
I love this game!
Hey ringworm.
Now you know the house rules, no %!&&#@$ after eleven.
Yeah I'm talking to you, you toxic waste of life. You gonna pick that butt up, or do I have to glue it to the end of my shoe and stick it in your big fat pimply a-hole?
He who hesitates, masturbates.
I got you the big screen TV, deluxe karaoke machine, and THX quality sound that would make George Lucas cream in his pants!
Caaaaaaaable guuuuuuy!
Uh-oh, Steven called the fuzz! "Bad boys, bad boys... whatcha gonna do?"
I was just blow drying my hair, thought I heard the phone ring. Ah... has that ever happened to you? Anyway... call me, we'll talk about it.
The name's Hank, %#&% face, learn it!
So, what's your tale, Mother Goose? Where ya from?
Holy Testicle Tuesday!
I can be your best friend or your worst enemy. You seem to prefer the latter.
Don't you get it? Someone has to save all the other cable boys and girls, someone has to kill the babysitter.
Well this is just a fist. But when I start throwing it around I can leave one hell of a mess.
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